August 2002
2002.08.30
Hello and Good-bye
12:48 AM PST :: comments: 4Said "Hello" to full-time-student-hood today. Took my first class--it was great. All throughout class, I grew more and more excited about what I was going to be reading and learning this semester. "I'm gonna enjoy this class. I can tell." was the distinct sentiment that formed in my head.
I came home to a message on my answering machine informing me that my grandmother had died. (Who informs people about the death of a family member via answering machine? My dad, that's who.) Class suddenly seems less exciting than it did five minutes ago. I am, frankly, stunned. Last I heard, she had been improving. I had been given assurances by family members that I would be kept up to date, that I would be told of any change in her condition, that I would be given a call "as soon as [anyone] knows anything."
At this point, she has been dead for close to 48 hrs. I'm just finding out now.
I had hoped to see her again. I was looking forward to spending a little time with her: holding her hand, maybe giving her a shoulder rub. Hearing that she was improving made me let down my guard. I relaxed a little. I thought to myself that maybe, just maybe, I might get to see her when I fly to SF for Thanksgiving. I put off calling to see how she was doing. Mistake.
I had wanted to say my good-byes to her while she was still alive. Instead I shall say my final farewells to her after she has already departed.
-wink
2002.08.28
Silver lining
09:27 PM PST :: comments: 0On the bright side: classes start tomorrow! ;)
-wink
Last day on the job
09:26 PM PST :: comments: 2Today was my last day at work. I'm surprisingly sad.
I'm not sad to be leaving and nobody is sad to see me go. That's what makes me sad.
I'm sad that I didn't enjoy work more, that I didn't find some way to make this a great job, that I didn't work at it harder, that I didn't find some way to endear myself to everyone. I feel like there could have been, must have been, some way to have loved this job. I'm filled with regret that I never found it.
So I leave my job, relieved to be gone, yet mourning a year of my life that, in this respect, failed to live up to potential.
-wink
2002.08.26
corporacial profiling
03:34 PM PST :: comments: 0When, oh when, will this day finally arrive?
-wink
i need to get in shape
03:21 PM PST :: comments: 0Tree and I went camping this weekend. Had a great time. Played volleyball with friends. Did not do any activity whcih could even remotely be considered "strenuous". On the drive home exhaustion overtook me, sending me to my favorite place: dreamland.
Good thing I wasn't driving.
Same thing happened to me last week. I went for a bike ride in the morning, and that afternoon I was completely non-functional until I took a nap. I didn't get sore. No cramping. No burning. No aches. I simply ran out of juice.
Apperently, I am so out of shape that even moderate exercise drains me of all blood sugar until sleep recharges my batteries.
Time to start some sort of exercise regimen. Must set my schedule carefully so that my required naps do not coincide with my classes. ;)
-wink